What's Now

I've spent a lot of time in a rocking chair over the past seven weeks. At least seven times a day, you'll find me there, nursing our little girl. And at least two of those times, you'll also find my little man keeping us company. Ezekiel loves to sit on his little bench in front of an end table. Most of the time, he's got his snack and his water bottle. But the real draw to that table?

The digital clock.

Over the past weeks, we've gotten really good at our numbers; things like counting and number recognition. But Ezekiel isn't the only one learning. He's teaching me quite a bit too.

As Zeke sits and waits in anticipation for the numbers to change, he joyfully and enthusiastically cries out: "What's NOW?!?"

And I'm reminded that I need to be focused on what's now.

Because, often times, in the past seven weeks, I've been wishing away Micaiah's first few months. I find myself looking ahead. Looking ahead to the days

When she's sleeping through the night.
When I can not be parked in that rocking chair as many times a day.
When she and Zeke can play trucks together.
When I can chase her down the hallway on my hands and knees.
When she crawls into my lap with a book.
When she and Zeke share bath time.
When she makes a mess of the kitchen by pulling out all the tupperware and utensils.
When we can go to the park and they can both play.

But that's not fair. Not to her, and not to Ezekiel. Because as I wish away these first few months of my daughter's life, wanting to move onto the next stage, I'm also wishing away the next few months of his life.

And his life has already gone fast enough. 

And already, so is Micaiah's. Only weeks ago I was wishing ahead to when she would smile more and interact with us more. Guess who is all smiles and already practicing training for a marathon?

So every day, every time I hear Zeke exclaim, "What's NOW?!?", I am reminded to live in today.

That it is a day that I will never get back.
That in a blink, my toddler will be a preschooler and my baby will be a toddler.
That although the days are sometimes long, the years go fast and can never be given back.
That this time is to be treasured, no matter the tiredness it brings.

To be honest, I'm glad Zeke asks me, "What's NOW?!?" every time he sees a clock and twenty plus times each feeding session. Because I need that constant reminder. And all too soon, I'll be wishing to have these exact days back.

So here's to living in what's now. In the everyday ordinary. In the days of spit-up; the days of two kids in diapers; the days of interrupted sleep. In the days of pure joy; in the days of uncontrollable laughter; in the days of un-measurable love. In the days of exhaustion; in the days of missed showers; in the days of Dr. Seuss.

Here's to treasuring every moment.